The day began with the big one feeding me, it was a deliciously good morning. Trotting along near the party I could smell new friends approaching; an elf crests the hill before us, my senses tell me he is a chaotic evil illusionist thief, he also smells vaguely of necromancy. I liked him. We travelled further as the newcomer got acquainted with my feeders.
Steadily bobbing along in our comfy cart filled with food and money I smelled ogres on the horizon, several ogres. Squealing with fear and apprehension I try to alert the young oaf but he just strokes me and rubs my back, I swear I was still worried for the safety of the party but I quietly oinked appreciatively anyway. Strangely everyone was still surprised when the ogres attacked later in the day… I assumed the idiotic farmer would be surprised, he’s surprised by most things, but the Liar I thought better of, oh well.
There is much commotion as the ogres snap branches and crush small rocks in their vague attempt at ambushing us, I really must learn a way to alert the group. I sit happily on the back of the cart observing as my friends slowly come to wakefulness, Nameless quickly clambers atop the cart and readies his spells, with confidence in his team and bravery in his eyes he waits.
As I mourned the loss of our brave companion the vultures swept in, Methis leapt in from the roof of the cart where moments before our friend was torn from us by the vicious Ogres as the rest of our troupe watched in horror and fear. The godly one stands at the door to the cart, thinking he is guarding our comrades worldly possessions; the gnome steals unseen by all. Vuranel roars a speech of praise for the nameless one who saved us more times than he knows and the glint of greed in everyone’s eyes dulls for the moment, everyone but the newcomer that is. “I’ll kill any who try to keep me from the prize!” he yells, Vuranel’s expression is pained and shocked, I wonder how he did not know the true nature of the elf despite my trying to show him. I do not wish to see more bloodshed this day so I shuffle disparately into the corner and lie down, eyes tightly shut, but still I hear the sound of swords ringing and spells being cast, before finally a stabbing sound followed by the unmistakeable crumple of a newly made corpse. Vuranel rightly buries the corpses with proper rites and pays due respect to their belongings.
The next few weeks are mournful and quiet, we are alone on this desolate path. My boy spends some time trying to teach me to fetch and other such activities, I indulge him to cheer his spirits, of course the treats didn’t hurt either. Eventually we arrive at the next city on our quest where we discover a most pressing dilemma, the man we need to speak with is nowhere to be found. After searching for some time we discover that he is currently in prison, to be executed soon, two brothers join us in our efforts to free him, one is likely what my boy will become given a score of years while the other is infinitely more interesting, I know nothing about him. Not a thing. He certainly warrants more investigation, perhaps I shall smell him later and he might stroke my back.
Valten wakes me up in the middle of the night and drags me along with him, the gnome and the grieving Alathia, my heart goes out to her, I soon realise we are doing something very stupid. Smart people do not try and break someone out of a judges prison compound in the middle of the night, and yet here we are.
The thieves leave us as Valten and I approach the guards, he attempts to engage them in conversation, no doubt a distraction technique. My wandering mind is brought abruptly back to the situation at hand when I hear the words “My pig does magic tricks.” Why he would ever say that I have no idea but I was forced to play along. After some rudimentary commands and sleight of hand the idiot guards take us into the back room out of the cold, Valten sits down to play poker and I just lie by the fire wondering why we are in a room surrounded by guards as our thieves slowly and clumsily make their way to the man who they’ve never seen before.